whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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