it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
