Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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