Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize