And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
