Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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