and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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