Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
