'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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