How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
