She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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