Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
so that wasnt chicken after all
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
