Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Randomize
