He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
