YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
My penis needs a shock collar
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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