i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
