haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
