don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize