He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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