She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
