You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize