I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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