Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
