yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
