So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize