there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
