She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
