So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
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