Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
