she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
