Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize