I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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