When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
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