Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
areolas are like halos for boobs.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
