There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
