First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
