i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
