Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
