I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
