we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
