is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Randomize
