just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
should my penis look like a turkey
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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