Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
