I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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