Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
