it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
