I wannas sexs uuuuu
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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