Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
