I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Randomize
