It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Randomize
