video games are the ultimate cock blocker
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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